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Contrast. Are you on your phone from the time you walk into your hair appointment, to the dryer, to the final look in the mirror? Total contrast from the image shared in the above picture. What did you do before the explosion of Social Media? How did you live? How did you think? How did you “govern” your quality of life or, discover your purpose? How did you cultivate friendships and relationships? The definition of Contrast is defined as the state of being strikingly different from something else. I am not here to bash or shun the use of Social Media, because clearly I use it. I am however, going to propose a moment of self-reflection and the “behaviors” attached to it.

Recently, I began to notice how much my thinking, intuition, judgement, and quality of life was beginning to shift. I started “lurking” for answers that I had never had questions for in the first place. So what happened? A year ago, I decided to answer the call of sharing my story, purpose, and gift, with the use of blogging and building a Social Media account to turn my pain into purpose. It was at that point, that I had to interact and succumb to the technology of the internet as a one of many vehicles to share my story.

All was going well, until the “hidden expectations”, “self comparisons sabotage” and “obsessive checking in” started to devour my psyche, spirit, and body. Pure Robot or VEG (aka Vegetable. Where a human totally loses track of time and wanders into the abyss of cyber space on a constant search for something unknown, while sitting, driving, eating, and using the bathroom… ok you get it). I started to notice a decline in patience. My intuition became dull. My sense of self became a bit rusty. I suddenly asked, “WHO AM I?” There is no way I can sit and watch every Insta Story, follow every acquaintance, keep engaged, support every call to action, cause, sale, event etc. However, I do realize there are apparently some “hidden expectations” to this Social Media game. You may not even realize this, but I myself just got into this a year ago. My own personal page Antres Finnie, is still private lol. So pardon me, if I don’t like, comment, share, tweet, support, or follow-back. I do recognize there may also be a need for me to adopt a “give and take” mentality to this whole business of Social Media. Which is cool, but just because I may not comment, share, or re-post, doesn’t make me any less of an authentic or loving person. Can you imagine if back in the day, every time you got a person’s phone number (home phone at that) you had to keep up with their blog, business, side hustle, project, call to action, email, text, DM…I mean can we just admit things have gone a bit weirdo? Oh, and please don’t bore me with the “Social Media can be used for good. To inform, to educate, to make aware.” Duh… I agree with you and support that. However, this unnecessary pressure to expect people to stay connected in both real life and virtual reality is not my thing (TOTAL REBEL). Allow a person to connect with you freely and fluidly using the ways that works best for their life. It’s cool, you know.

Before Social Media told you how to be, what to wear, what to eat, what to invest in, or even what your purpose was, I have a question, “How did you decide for yourself?” “What have we taken our eyes off of?” Pastors are no longer in just the Church world, they are in the palm of your hand, every hour, minute and second of the day. I tweeted this week, “Is it me, or has Social Media turned into the world’s longest running infomercial?” (All humor, some sarcasm). Your life deserves more than 24 hour dependence (borderline addiction) to cyberspace. Here’s the thing, to each is own. Find your way. I just started to notice some things, and decided to write about it, lol.

Rebel on,


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